Tips for Parents to Stay Motivated During Work-From-Home Scenario

What Hong Kong did to contain Covid-19, the rest of the world has been playing catch-up, as residents of the city have been in various versions of self-quarantine and work-from-home since the end of January. It has stretched beyond the usual 14 days or 21 days. Many of us have been holed up at home for close to 10 weeks, and counting. Parents huddled indoors while managing work and family have the added challenge of homeschooling kids. The current crisis looms large and there is no evident end in sight. What can parents do in such a scenario? How do they keep themselves motivated in addition to being the perfect parent for their kids?

We at Whizpa bring to you a collation of valuable tips gleaned from some experienced parents as well as experts. Let's tune in:

Scheduling is the Most Critical Component

It is easy to lose track of time and not get the work done if we don't schedule well. Scheduling helps you break down your day into different segments, and plan ahead, allotting separate time slots for kids, work, and self-care. Schedule in a way that you have a broad pattern of routine to stick to. Everyone in the family will eventually align themselves to that routine.

Keep the Focus on the Present

With doom and gloom blaring from across news platforms, it is understandable to press the panic button. But experts warn and suggest rather than worry about what can happen in the next 30 days or year, just focus on the 24 hours in front of you and do what you can to get closer to where you want to be. Take it one day at a time.

Get your Daily Dose of Exercise

Keep your body moving. If you are in a location where you're still allowed to step out, do consider going for a run or a stroll for 30 minutes or so. Pick early mornings or late nights and choose locations which are relatively less crowded. If, however, you are in a mandatory quarantine, consider cranking up the music and dance away or simply follow a YouTube zumba/aerobics channel. Some say it takes 21 days to form a habit. This just might be that window.

Identify a Long-Term Project

Psychologists mention now is a good time to invest your energies in a long term project. You can think about the things that excite you. How about starting the Harry Potter series, or learning a new musical instrument, picking up knitting? You can even consider brushing up on a new language. It's advisable to use 20-30 minuets each day to contribute to your long-term project. The sense of satisfaction derived from doing something new can certainly help you sail through this crisis better.

Enjoy Some Lightness and Humour

Give yourself a break, watch some funny videos on the internet, or catch your children having fun. If you have the time, plan a comedy movie night with your family or loved ones.

Dress for Work / Social Life You Want

Don't be tempted to stay in your night pyjamas throughout your day. A well ironed shirt, a bright scarf, well done hair, some make up, can do wonders in brightening up your mood and making you feel an important part of the wheel of life.

Earmark Office Space

No doubt our houses in Hong Kong are usually small and there is just about enough room for everyone. However, if your house allows, demarcate a separate section for your home office. Invest in a comfortable work chair and desk. It can make a huge difference to your levels of efficiency.

Allow Screen Time

Yes, you heard us right. New Zealand's Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern recently had a conversation with a leading psychologist, Nigel Latta and Nigel pointed out that like us, our kids are also missing out on their social life. They need their friends and cousins now more than ever. Go ahead and give them unfettered access to their gadgets. Have them Zoom, Skype or FaceTime their friends regularly. Don't feel guilty if you have to let your kids spend a lot of time in front of screens and watch the 'safe shows' in the coming few weeks. No harm will come to them and no, you are not being a bad parent for wanting the things to be calm and settled at home.

Limit the Intake of News

Consume only what is necessary. Keep yourself updated but don't be drawn into deep analysis. Limit news intake especially around kids; they distill content differently. Focus more on what those around us and across the world are doing to bring cheer or save lives and making a difference.

Play with Kids

Set aside at least 30 minutes quality time with kids - No gadgets, no distractions. Spending focused time makes you feel less guilty. Also, younger children often can't verbalise as well as the older ones but play-based activities ensure they get the much-needed support from us.

Invest in a Self-Care Toolkit

A New York based psychologist, Dr Eileen M Feliciano (specialist in School and Clinical Psychology) says a successful self-care strategy is a must-have these days. It involves a sensory component (seven senses - touch, taste, sight, hearing, smell, vestibular/movement, and proprioceptive/comforting pressure). Here's an idea for each - a stuffed animal, a hot cup of caramel coffee, photos of family vacation, comforting music, lavender oil, a rocking chair, a weighted blanket. This kit will of course look different for different adults. Experiment and choose what works for you. For children, it is a good idea to look for a shoe box or a small bin that they can decorate and help them fill up their self-care kit which they can use at the time of a meltdown.

Be a Good Samaritan Yourself

Find ways to give back to your community. Support restaurants, offer to grocery shop for an elderly neighbour, check in with friends and family and offer any help you can, big or small.  Helping others gives us a sense of agency, especially when things seem out of control.

Control What You Can

Experts say identify something in your environment which you can control and then go ahead and conquer it completely. In moments of uncertainty, having some control can keep one sane. Thoroughly organise your wardrobe, clean out your kids' toy rack, group your books/stationery items. This activity can help keep us grounded when the bigger things are chaotic and out of control.

Reach Out for Help

You may already be feeling overwhelmed and stretched and nothing might seem to work for you. Don't forget to make a few calls and find a social worker/psychologist or even a patient friend, who can help you through a phone call/video chat.  There is always help available, just be brave and reach out.

It's interesting to note that when psychologists work with people undergoing trauma, they try to help victims look for a potential positive outcome or a meaning that will come out of the current destruction. We all need to figure out those lessons for ourselves too. What can all of us learn here, in our own family lives, in our communities, in our states, countries and the world at large? We also need to tell ourselves, this won't last forever. Soon a cure/ vaccine will be found, and the world will again hold up an 'open' sign for yet another adventure. Just that this time, we need to be more gentle and caring towards our planet and fellow beings.

Do let us know how you are coping with your work-from-home scenarios and parenting. We'd love to hear from you.